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Ficlet for the weekend challenge

This is for the weekend challenge .  My prompt was tuna casserole.

Title: Death by Tuna Casserole
Fandom: SG-1
Rating: G
Summary: Team night goes wrong

Jack knew it was a mistake when he’d agreed to let Sam host team night.  Something deep inside kept screaming at him that he should insist on doing it at his house but he squelched the voice.  After all, team night was usually pizza, beer, and a movie.  What could go wrong?

As soon as he walked in the door, Daniel and Teal’c trailing him, he knew he should have listened to his instincts.  The dining room table was set for four with a tablecloth and china plates – not typical for pizza and beer.

“Um, this looks nice,” Daniel ventured as he looked at the table carefully.

“A little fancy for pizza,” Jack pointed out hoping against hope.

“Who said anything about pizza, Sir?  I cooked.”

A silence fell across the room as the three men exchanged quick, worried looks.  “You…uh…you cooked?”  Daniel asked.  “That’s…uh…that great.”

“Indeed,” Teal’c agreed although the skeptical look on his face said just the opposite.

“Why don’t you guys sit down and I’ll get dinner,” Sam said either missing or ignoring he concern coming from her teammates.

As the three men sat, Daniel started going through his pockets.  He pulled out a mangled roll of Rolaids and held it up triumphantly.  “I’m covered.”

“I think there’s some Pepto in the truck,” Jack added.

As the two looked expectantly at Teal’c he said, “My symbiote will protect me.”

The three pasted smiles on their faces as Carter came back in carry a steaming casserole dish.  She set it down on a trivet in the middle of the table and smiled at her guests.  “Hope you guys like it.”  She gestured to the dish then sat.  “Dig in.”

Although Daniel was the first to scoop some of the casserole onto his plate, Teal’c was the one who was daring enough to try it first.  “This is most…unusual…Major Carter.  What is it called?”

“It’s tuna casserole,” Sam answered with a bright smile.  “I found a recipe in a magazine and thought I’d give it a try…although I did make a few tweaks to it.”  She looked expectantly at her other teammates.  “So?”

“Um, Teal’c’s right,” Daniel said diplomatically.  “It’s unusual.”

“Yeah, Carter,” Jack chimed in.  “What are these green things?”  When he saw a look of hesitation on her part, he quickly waved his hand.  “Never mind.  Let’s just say they’re the secret ingredient.”

The three men did their best to eat the tuna casserole without letting Sam know just how it tasted.  Mostly, Jack and Daniel kept up a stream of small talk so they could limit how much time they actually spent eating although Jack actually did a better job of keeping the food away from his mouth than Daniel did.

About ten minutes into the meal, Sam jumped up from the table.  “I think I left the oven on,” she said before rushing to the kitchen.

“Probably doesn’t want us to see her taking a hit of Pepto,” Jack said softly.  He pointed across to Daniel with his fork.  “You ok, there.  You’re starting to look the same color as the secret ingredient.”

Daniel shook his head and dropped the fork to his plate.  He started rubbing his stomach.  “I’m not really feeling so good.”  He suddenly doubled over letting out a groan.

“Daniel?” Jack asked rising half out of his chair.  “What’s wrong?”

“Hurts,” Daniel forced out.  “Hurts really bad.”

Jack was quickly around the table supporting Daniel.  “Help me get him to the couch.”  Between him and Teal’c, they moved the ill man into the living room and laid him on the couch.  “Crap, she actually poisoned one of us,” Jack muttered as he knelt by Daniel’s side.

Sam came back in and noticed that everyone had moved into the living room.  “What’s going on,” she asked as he joined them.

“O’Neill believes that you’ve poisoned Daniel Jackson,” Teal’c informed her.

“Daniel?” Sam asked moving closer to the prone man.

Daniel began to writhe in pain, grabbing Jack’s hand and squeezing it.  “Make it stop,” he begged.

Jack pulled his keys from his pocket and handed them over to Sam.  “Go start up my truck.  Teal’c give me a hand with him.  I think we need to get to the infirmary ASAP.”

“I’m so sorry,” Sam blurted out then ran out of the house to the truck.

With Jack at the wheel, they made the drive back to the mountain in a little more than half the time it normally took.  Sam had called ahead and Janet was waiting for them as soon as they arrived.  Daniel was whisked away to the infirmary leaving Jack, Sam, and Teal’c to wait outside for word of what was wrong.

“You sure you didn’t put anything weird in that casserole,” Jack asked.  “You said you tweaked it.”

“No, Sir.  Besides, you and I are fine.  You don’t…you don’t really think it was my cooking, do you, Sir,” she asked uneasily.

Janet came out of the infirmary sparing Jack actually having to answer the question.  “So?” he demanded.  “What’s wrong?”

“Daniel’s being prepped for surgery right now,” Janet began.

“Surgery?” Sam squeaked out.  “Oh my God.”

Janet spared a quick look at Sam then turned back to Jack.  “He’s got acute appendicitis.  I’m not sure but I think it may have burst.”  She was confused when she saw the looks of relief come over the other three.  “This is serious,” she informed them.

“Yeah, Doc.  We get that,” Jack said.  “It’s just that it’s better than what we thought.”

“And what was that?” Janet prompted.

“Death by tuna casserole,” Teal’c intoned.


( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 8th, 2014 03:20 am (UTC)
Sweet! :). Very nice twist, I didn't see it coming. How often do you find people cheering for acute appendicitis?!
Jun. 8th, 2014 04:00 am (UTC)
Thanks. I thought that would be an interesting little twist.
Jun. 8th, 2014 08:34 pm (UTC)
LOL - I could totally see them in this scene. My favorite bit was Teal'c saying that his symbiote would protect him, ROFLMAO!
Jun. 9th, 2014 12:18 pm (UTC)
Thanks. I could hear him saying it as I was writing it. :)
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )


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